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Jokes...post them here.

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billyfridge:
Subject: Re: VOTED THE BEST JOKE IN UK IN 2006

A very loud, unattractive, hard-faced woman walks into K-mart with her
two kids in tow, screaming obscenities at them all the way through
the entrance. 
The door greeter says, "Good morning and welcome to K-mart, nice
children you've got there. Are they twins?"

The fat ugly woman stops screaming long enough to snarl: "Of course
they bloody aren't! The oldest is nine and the youngest is seven. Why
the hell would you think they're twins?..... Do you really think they
look alike, you d*ckhead?"

"Absolutely not," replies the greeter, "I just can't believe anyone
would f**k you twice!"

 :D

 

billyfridge:

SENIORS GIVING BIRTH

With all the new technology regarding fertility recently, a 65-year-old
woman was able to give birth to a baby.

When she was discharged from the hospital and went home, her relatives
came to visit.

'May we see the new baby?' one asked.
'Not yet,' said the mother. 'I'll make coffee and we can visit for
awhile first.'

Thirty minutes had passed, and another relative asked, 'May we see the
new baby now?'

'No, not yet,' said the mother. After another few minutes had elapsed,
they asked again, 'May we see the baby now?'

'No, not yet,' replied the mother.

Growing very impatient, they asked, 'Well, when can we see the baby?'

'WHEN HE CRIES!' she told them.

'WHEN HE CRIES?' they demanded. 'Why do we have to wait until he cries?'

'BECAUSE I FORGOT WHERE I PUT HIM'.

texasboy:
 ;D Billy,  Me being politically correct enjoyed the K-Mart one.lol

Confucius say Chinese woman flying upside down in aircraft have "honourable crack up"
cheers

gr1ngo:
wee johnny walks into his parents bedroom and see's his dad giving his mum a good seeing to, laughing like hell his dad throws a pillow at him and shouts "get out of here ya bugger" a short while later the johnny's dad hears a commotion from johnny's room
so he rushes in and is horrified to see we johnny giving his gran a seeing to,
johnny just looks at him and says...
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.not so fecking funny when its your mum is it ? ? ?

texasboy:
 ;D ;D Way to go gringo.lol
cheers

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